There are not words to express how much I love 
you.  I swear, if I win that ultimate dream 
wishlist cel, I will build a shrine to you in my 
bedroom and climb a mountain just to sing your 
praises.

If I get outbid, I will jump off of that 
selfsame mountain into the deep, dark pit of 
despair from which there is no return and which 
only the jumbo econo-sized bucket of Haagendas 
from Sam's can soothe.